The Five Year Anniversary
It seems hard to believe, but March 24, 2023, will be the five-year anniversary of Aidan’s accident. In some ways, time seems to have flown by and the pain seems to have lessened. But there are certainly also times when it seems like yesterday and the pain springs up fresh and my emotions get the better of me.
The most usual thing is to wonder what Aidan would be doing right now. His girlfriend, Lauren, has managed to stay on schedule with her schooling, and she will be graduating this spring with a degree in physical therapy from the University of Indianapolis and then starting graduate school in the fall.
I suspect Aidan might not be that far along. I think he likely would have gone to school somewhere small to play baseball with the hope of proving himself and then transferring to compete on a larger stage. His buddy Roman did just this, and I think Aidan could have succeeded is such a goal as well. If things had worked out, we would either just be getting back from or scheduling a trip somewhere south to watch him play.
Last Friday was St. Patrick’s Day, and Kathy Kershner, who is the moderator for the Aidan’s Masterpiece club at St. Joe, was kind enough to invite us over to experience her Irish heritage. As dinner concluded, the conversation somehow turned to Aidan, and she retold the experience she had with him in the classroom just a few days before the accident. Kathy’s gift for telling that story has not diminished over time, and she certainly brought tears to my eyes by the time she was finished.
It was wonderful to hear her emphasizing again the certainty that Aidan had about his calling in life. He was not sure how he would do it, but he knew he was called to a life of service. His legacy continues to go on at St. Joe via the service club established in his name, and also at the Catherine Griffin House (CGH).
Saying Goodbye
Unfortunately, we have some sad news to share from the CGH. Timothy Dooley, one of the original residents, passed away this February in his room at the age of sixty-three. Because of a variety of factors, it was a couple of days before he was discovered. These circumstances have made this an uncertain and trying time. It’s hard not to feel some doubt about whether we could have done more, or at least been aware and involved enough that he would have been discovered sooner.
The feeling of helplessness, whether from Aidan’s accident or Timothy’s death, is bound to linger. Timothy was not my blood relative. We came from different social strata and different cultural backgrounds, but I knew him well enough to consider him a friend. When we saw each other, the greeting always included an embrace and a sincere feeling of fellowship. When we parted, he always made sure to wish us a “blessed day.”
Timothy was our first line of communication to the guys at the house. He was the one we communicated with to set meetings or just to find out what was happening. He often texted just to let us know he was thinking of us and to wish us well. Despite having back issues (he would show you the X-ray), he did his fair share and more when it came to keeping the house up or doing a good deed in the neighborhood. There was always a certain sense of hopefulness and joy about Timothy. His smiling face will be remembered and missed.
The sense of loss and the need to grieve are still there. It’s only been a month, and we are trying to be patient and not rush. Timothy used to always tell us, “God’s got me.” He believed this with his whole heart, and we believed it about him. We have no doubt that his union with God is now complete. God does indeed, have him.
Looking Forward
Soon, we will decide how to move forward with the CGH. Timothy’s passing provides an opportunity to regroup and reassess. We will be looking at ways to become closer and deeper in our relationship with Robert and Howell and thinking about ways the house can become an even stronger force for positive outcomes in the neighborhood. Part of that will hopefully be regular postings here that will give up-to-date progress reports on what is happening.
In the meantime, we now add Timothy to our prayers, both for his eternal well-being, and for his intercession on our behalf. He might be physically gone, but we will continue to feel his presence and influence as we seek to follow through on Aidan’s stated purpose.
As the logo says, we will continue to “live to serve,” and hopefully the memory of Timothy will inspire us to do that a little better each day.